Potties Illustrated, Susanna Kallur and more

I plan to write these posts as narrative accounts whenever possible, but I'm afraid today's is going to be a bit of a list again. I have a lot to say and my brain is crippled by jet lag and perhaps a slight overuse injury. Bonnier AB got their money's worth out of me today, for sure, since we're simultaneously working on the presentation materials for the GRID conference and the company's new brand strategy. It's fascinating stuff, especially at the Venn intersection of the two topics, where there lies a list of words developed in a brainstorming meeting to describe Bonnier's "core values," and the directions the branding initiative could possibly take. We'll be asking the GRID attendees to help us cull the list down to a couple of ideas to be graphically interpreted, so it's important that the sense of each word be perfect before we start. This is a very nuanced task, because as anyone who works with language knows, there are no true synonyms and every term means something just slightly different. Words may be interchangeable in certain contexts, but when they're standing alone they have to be precise. Which is why my brain hurts. And now for the listy thing:

1. Danish bathrooms: I happened to look up at the ceiling of one of the bathrooms at Bonnier AB today and was amused to discover that it was wallpapered with a gigantic cover of Illustreret Videnskab, the original Danish version of Science Illustrated. I said to Niklas, "Have you ever noticed that Science Illustrated is on the ceiling of the bathroom near Maria's office?" And he said, "No, but it's the Danish edition right? All the bathroom ceilings are Danish." Come back? Say what? Apparently, the interior designers got to the end of putting up the decor in the building and realized they hadn't represented the Danish magazines anywhere, so Jonas told them to paper the ceilings in every bathroom with a title from Denmark. I've heard there's a historic rivalry between Sweden and Denmark on a national level, which makes me wonder whether this decision was made with some good-natured mischief in mind.

2. Affirmative Gasping: I'm fascinated with the inhaling sound Scandinavians make when they're agreeing with you. It means "mmmhmmm" or "uh huh," but it's a quick intake of air that sounds exactly like the kind of gasp someone in the U.S. might make to signal alarm when they think they see something bad about to happen (a car swerving into your lane, a vase about to crash to the ground, etc). Because these are the sorts of events I associate with that sound, I jump out of my skin every time someone does it, like "My God, what's wrong?" Believe me, there was a lot of agreeable gasping in this morning's brainstorming meeting, and by the end of the two hours I was ready for a stiff drink.

3. Swedish Food: I'm really into restaurants, so there will probably be quite a few posts on food to come, but I want to start out by reporting that although everything so far has been yummy, I'm going to quickly get sick of fish and potatoes. There's some charming stuff in the markets here, though. Chanterelles are in season, and they're supercheap. I've got a bunch in the fridge that I'm going to sautee with garlic and pasta tomorrow. Also, every time I go to Europe, I'm always really irritated that they have better versions of American products than we do. My theory is that Americans as a people have retardedly simple palates, and since interesting variations on commonplace products don't do well in consumer marketing tests here, they get sent to Europe. My two favorite Swedish finds so far: vanilla-rhubarb yogurt and Special K cereal with whole, freeze-dried blueberries and blackberries.

4. Susanna Kallur: Yesterday morning the whole office raced up to the TV lounge to watch angelic Swedish hurdler Susanna Kallur try for a gold medal. Sadly, seconds after the gun went off, she caught a foot on the first obstacle and went tumbling to the ground. Rather than dwelling on the heartbreak, the Swedes immediately got pissed. At Bonnier, people just shook their heads and walked back to their desks, silently fuming. Poor Susanna wept bitterly during the brutal press interviews after her failed race, and ended up puffy-eyed and tear-stained all over this morning's tabloids. She was Sweden's last hope for 2008 Olympic gold, and because of the unlucky timing of her event, she took the fall (no pun intended) for all the other athletes who didn't quite make the podium.